How do you avoid having your feelings hurt?
The saying goes; someone can only hurt you if you give them permission to play with your feelings and emotions. In essence that is true and the easy answer therefore would be to not allow anyone to play with emotions and feelings.
Whilst that would certainly prevent the heart from feeling the pain of being hurt it would also deny the wonderful feelings that come with love. Love is giving that permission to someone to hurt you, and hurt you in the most painful of ways. The answer then is to avoid falling in love in the first place.
I do not for one second believe we can actually avoid love. Sure as the day is long I have sworn I will never love again more times than I care or want to remember. I have put up the psychological and emotional barriers that scream stay out of my space, and always when I do there will be someone who knows how to find the cracks in my armour.
The one thing that I have learned is that putting those shields up that I believed would protect me actually makes me more vulnerable to making errors of judgement. As I believe I am safe the weapons of instinct and awareness are not fully armed and cannot function in the whirlpool of intense emotion that is falling in love.
Instinct and awareness are not going to be at their best anyway as falling in love clouds the judgement and we make some lousy decisions. In the disarmed state behind the barriers they stand no chance at all.
© JG Farmer 2015